In my work, I get to see the underbelly of our social order: the patterns of unhappiness and hardship which we suffer alone, but which are shared by others in epidemic proportions. These are the disorders of society which breed widespread personal unhappiness.

James Hillman, Jungian analyst, alludes to just such a societal disorder when he comments that one of the hardest things which he has to treat is his clients’ schedules. Hillman notes that their schedules are their defenses against change. Said another way, your personal organizer is your defense. Your to-do list is your personal tyrant. Your busyness is your soul’s captor. We haven’t the time to allow into our lives the changes that would be a salve to our souls.

Another expression of this societal disorder is a profoundly unhappy friend who regularly works 60 to 80 hour weeks. When asked why she doesn’t refuse to work such hours, she replies, “I can’t.” She’s is afraid of losing her job, although she is losing her soul. She notes her company’s informal motto is “excellence through anxiety.” I kid you not. It reminds me of another person who mentioned his company’s informal motto is “excellence through paranoia.” Read more »

Imagine you’re playing a card game. A very unusual card game. Matter of fact, it’s a game you play every day. It’s called, “Life”. Every day, you’re dealt the cards of your life situation. Every day the same other player wins. Here’s today’s play.

The cards are dealt: today’s life situation.

The first player throws out a judgment. “It shouldn’t be like this!”

The next player tosses in an expectation. “I’m disappointed.”

The third player slams down an argument. Read more »

Do you use shop therapy to feel better when you’re depressed? When you see something you want, do feel the need to buy it as if driven by an unseen force? Are you over your head in debt but keep on shopping anyway? Is your spending affecting your relationships and personal life? Do you find yourself feeling depressed and guilty after a big shopping spree?

If you have all or a few of the signs above, you may be a compulsive spender or “shopaholic”.

Psychologists have defined the compulsive spender as a person who occupies so much time shopping or thinking about shopping that it affects their life in an adverse way. This can lead to broken relationships, low self esteem, depression and guilt. Psychologists have also said that guilty feelings actually make the problem worse, turning it into a vicious cycle. Compulsive shoppers try and soothe the guilt and depression by going out and shopping….again.

Luckily, if you are a compulsive shopper, you are not alone. There are groups and meetings that can help support you in your endeavor to stop compulsive spending. I’ve also put together some tips to help you get your shopping under control.

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I am a classic witch in the woods. You have to drive up a windy dirt road to get to my home. No neighbors in sight, although they are tucked away here and there so that I have community. Outside, medicine is growing everywhere; inside it is drying everywhere. When I’m not playing with my herbs I am gardening, gathering wild mushrooms or other seasonal bounty, cooking, writing, sitting around the fire, hanging with other women. I sleep with my cat who is a dainty, fierce, huntress that is shamelessly adored by me and everyone else who happens to come to my home.

Several years ago I was told that coffee trashes my kidneys. Knowing that they support the amount of sexual energy, (Qi) I have, I knew immediate action was required. That was one thing I wasn’t willing to compromise. I found a basic recipe for an herbal coffee substitute, played around with some roots from my yard, added a little local honey and dark chocolate and magically came up with a decoction that is a powerful tonic for the liver, kidneys and heart while building the blood and Qi. Add a little cream and you have a delicious latte. How’s that for a little magic? I hope you enjoy it!

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Do you find yourself procrastinating and avoiding things you know you should be doing? Does procrastination get in the way of your peace of mind and livelihood?

Procrastination is something that we all do to one extent or another. We’ve all been there. We put off tasks or projects that we’re not excited about until the last minute. Meanwhile, our “to do list” gets out of control, everything piles up, and we feel so stressed out we want to scream, “Calgon take me away!”

Why Do We Procrastinate?

Procrastination helps us to avoid unpleasant activities we don’t want to do. Procrastination allows us to temporarily enjoy an escape from dreaded tasks by creating a distraction, giving us the illusion of relief. Unfortunately, procrastination tricks us into thinking that we can relax and enjoy ourselves; when in reality, our stress and tension only continues to build.

Procrastination the Productivity Buster

Procrastination affects your time management and productivity for several reasons. Procrastination causes you to feel guilty and weighs you down. It’s a heavy feeling on your shoulders that takes up unneccssary energy that you could be using to bring in more money for your business. Guilt can cause physical illnesses, anxiety, and depression. It affects your mindset and tricks you into thinking and feeling like you’re “not good enough.”

“Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task.” – Don Marquis

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You are refreshing and vital as the air; graceful and tender as sparkling
Water; lustrous and consuming as flames of fire, generous and enveloping
As space and stable and deep as the earth… You, elemental woman, are
Perfect beauty itself.

When we talk about beauty in the context of Ayurveda, it should be perfectly clear from the start that we are not talking about market-driven ideals of the moment.  In Ayurveda, inner and outer beauty are intimately related.  The more we nurture ourselves, the more radiant we become physically and expressively – regardless of our particular body shape or proportions.

In keeping with the general orientation of eastern philosophy and healing, beauty can be viewed as having three aspects; an outer, inner, and secret aspect. When one balances the outer and inner, one has accomplished the secret aspect.

Outer beauty is what we most commonly associate with the field of beauty.  It is the perfection of what is visually perceived.  It includes the obvious traits such as contours of the body, texture of the skin, and the quality of the hair and nails.  But in Ayurveda, it also includes grace in posture and movement and the subtle qualities of freshness, vitality and magnetizing brightness of being. Ayurveda has always understood beauty to be the product of general physical health and appropriate daily care.  It is not just a cosmetic event.  The emphasis is on self knowledge and development of positive routines and habits that literally bring out the best in ourselves.

Read more »

It is summer, the fire element, the element that rules our sexual, creative energy. It is the season that is based on relationships and transformation. It is the peak of the wave of the yearly seasonal cycle.

My relationship with my sisters, our support and service to one another in this time of collective transition is very important to me. I feel it is a critical piece to our collective healing. It is not just the healing of women I refer to, but the healing of us all that will be affected through this sisterhood.

Relationships are important to the feminine. As women travel the transformational journey of healing the feminine principle we are confronted with the shadow side of relating from a disempowered posture in life. We have believed in a dysfunctional society’s perspective of our own power, or lack of it.

I recently discovered a shadow side of my relationship with the beloved sisterhood I cherish. I met up with a friend and her new partner one evening. I had a lot in common with her partner, so the conversation was enjoyable. I was happy for my friend to find such a good match for herself. I left feeling good, feeling seen, feeling generally delighted at the entire evening. My fire was alive and I didn’t hide myself with insecurities, etc.

I ran into my friend with her partner the next day. All she had to do was look at me with no smile, no words, just look. Without any conscious thought I immediately pulled in my energy, dimmed my light, and barely acknowledged her partner that I had just experienced a nice connection with the previous night.

I followed the thread of this reaction and realized that a part of me feels my relationships with my women friends are so important that I don’t allow myself to be my full expression, especially if there is any indication that it feels threatening to them. I knew I had not been in the least bit inappropriate and this had to be her own insecurity, but it didn’t matter. I was compensating for it. I have dimmed my fire all my life so I would be accepted.

Read more »

The last six months have provided an opportunity for me to work with a group of elderly residents in a convalescent care facility implementing essential oils to mitigate the symptoms of dementia and Alzheimer’s.

Having cared for an elderly Aunt for 7 years who suffered from advanced stages of Parkinson’s, I learned firsthand how valuable essential oils are for working with people with delusional states of reality, agitation, anxiety and depression. I had such success working with oils, and endeavored to create a six-month study with the hopes of introducing aromatherapy and the use of essential oils as a protocol to work with the other residents who suffer from dementia and Alzheimer’s dis-ease.

Having completed the six-months, we are now looking at the best methods in which to implement using the oils as a protocol as the results we experienced were so outstanding and exciting with every resident experiencing positive effects100% of the time.

Very soon into the study, I discovered, and received feedback from caregivers, that my aromatherapy class was the favorite hour of the week, and Read more »

Do you want to know the most amazing words an eleven year old can hear? Those words are “Only 20 days of school left!” I heard this the other day, and flipped out. The school year has gone by so fast, and I had no idea it was almost over. I’m not saying I am sad that it’s over, I feel the opposite actually, but I feel like we had just started when it ended.

I am really looking forward to summer though, and there is no denying it. I can’t wait for our wet, gray, cold weather to magically turn into a bright warming day, where, for the first time, we actually want to be outside. I can feel it now, my memories so vivid. Sun outside my window shining on us like a giant spotlight, making everyone smile.  Smiling is the key to summer. And the flowers -  pink, blue, orange, just there for you to admire so that you can say “Hey! That is one beautiful little plant!”

Summer is really the key to happiness. It opens a warm, bright window of lunch with your parents, bike rides to cute little ice-cream shops, and not wearing anything but your new bathing suit—and still being hot! It’s the ultimate vacation where you don’t need to leave your neighborhood, so you still have your friends. And everywhere you go, you can hear the laughter.

Just a little longer….

When we talk about beauty in the context of Ayurveda, it should be perfectly clear from the start that we are not talking about market-driven ideals of the moment.  In Ayurveda, inner and outer beauty are intimately related.  The more we nurture ourselves, the more radiant we become physically and expressively – regardless of our particular body shape or proportions.

In keeping with the general orientation of eastern philosophy and healing, beauty can be viewed as having three aspects; an outer, inner, and secret aspect. When one balances the outer and inner, one has accomplished the secret aspect.

Outer beauty is what we most commonly associate with the field of beauty.  It is the perfection of what is visually perceived.  It includes the obvious traits such as contours of the body, texture of the skin, and the quality of the hair and nails.  But in Ayurveda, it also includes grace in posture and movement and the subtle qualities of freshness and vitality and magnetizing brightness of being. Ayurveda has always understood beauty to be the product of general physical health and appropriate daily care.  It is not just a cosmetic event.  The emphasis is on self knowledge and development of positive routines and habits that literally will bring out the best in ourselves.

Read more »