It is summer, the fire element, the element that rules our sexual, creative energy. It is the season that is based on relationships and transformation. It is the peak of the wave of the yearly seasonal cycle.
My relationship with my sisters, our support and service to one another in this time of collective transition is very important to me. I feel it is a critical piece to our collective healing. It is not just the healing of women I refer to, but the healing of us all that will be affected through this sisterhood.
Relationships are important to the feminine. As women travel the transformational journey of healing the feminine principle we are confronted with the shadow side of relating from a disempowered posture in life. We have believed in a dysfunctional society’s perspective of our own power, or lack of it.
I recently discovered a shadow side of my relationship with the beloved sisterhood I cherish. I met up with a friend and her new partner one evening. I had a lot in common with her partner, so the conversation was enjoyable. I was happy for my friend to find such a good match for herself. I left feeling good, feeling seen, feeling generally delighted at the entire evening. My fire was alive and I didn’t hide myself with insecurities, etc.
I ran into my friend with her partner the next day. All she had to do was look at me with no smile, no words, just look. Without any conscious thought I immediately pulled in my energy, dimmed my light, and barely acknowledged her partner that I had just experienced a nice connection with the previous night.
I followed the thread of this reaction and realized that a part of me feels my relationships with my women friends are so important that I don’t allow myself to be my full expression, especially if there is any indication that it feels threatening to them. I knew I had not been in the least bit inappropriate and this had to be her own insecurity, but it didn’t matter. I was compensating for it. I have dimmed my fire all my life so I would be accepted.
My deepening relationship with my own Pele energy has brought this to the surface as she demands that I no longer apologize for who I am, in all my glorious, wondrous, divine feminine magnificence. I have been supporting women to own this within themselves for quite awhile now. I am grateful for this glimpse into myself and how easy it is to dim my light.
How many of us women are dimming our light fueled by our fire because we don’t want to be rejected? The other side of the dysfunctional coin is how many of us know how to shine this light fueled by our fire that is not wrapped in the package of what we were taught by a society that fears it? How many of us women feel threatened by another who allows this to shine through? How many of us are clean with this energy and know it beyond the perspective of a very old worn out paradigm that has put this into a box that suits it?
These are good questions to ask ourselves in this season of the fire element. We need our sisterhood. We also need our sexual creative life force energy. We need a different perspective of this energy so we are not threatened by it, so we can fan the flames for one another to shine in our magnificence, offering our gifts to a world that needs them. We need to own this energy with no apologies. We need an authentic relationship with it so we are not threatened by another’s expression of their fire. We need to become masters of this sexual, creative energy so our light can shine fully in our own power and create a society that is aligned with our authenticity.
Enjoy this summer, enjoy your fire, and allow it to fuel your relationships in a healthy authentic way with no apologies for your magnificence. Allow your fire to burn brightly.
Mary Lane, author of Divine Nourishment, A Woman’s Sacred Journey with Food.”