The Space We Occupy
Five people in my immediate world have died in the last two months. They slipped away during the night; they left when 911 was called and responded. Bodies weary, worn, weathered and no longer wondrous with life, let go of earthly hold. Spirits tireless, bright, dignified and elegant uttered their final messages — silent words of release and love. Somewhere in the years of then and now these five people lived. Through inspiration, objective, focus, responsibility and trust, each of these men and women were constant to their role as human being. Clearly without perfection they sought to live nobly, a testament to the grace rooted at their core.
“Maturing is not just aging. It’s taking responsibility for the time you take up and the space you occupy,” Maya Angelou affirms. Within the bounds and limits of expanding ourselves, we as conscious individuals attempt — and often fail– to express our soul’s aspirations. We become mired in doubt, believing we are less-than. Ego driven, we are afraid to look, act or BE older. Media reports to us unceasingly, the countless ways to remain beautiful, youthful and ageless. We have forgotten we are not these bodies. We live in fear of wrinkles, flawed countenance and loss of sex drive. Instead of taking stock of how we give back to the world, we fixate on how we appear to the world. By doing so, are we not misusing the space we occupy?
I believe aging is — in part– about discovering our purpose, uncovering the picture of a bigger story. This enterprise is no small task. It requires presence and deep consideration. Some days I struggle with my attempts at soul’s work. Some days, I’m not even sure I know what that work is! Caught up in my own human fears of aging — physical limitations more apparent, dreams unfulfilled, making sense of the reasons for my existence — I let ego steer me away from the knowing I AM spirit. I live in the past of regret and the future of what-if-only.
During these times, corralling my attention to the moment is imperative. I don’t ignore my fears; I move through them. I strive to age with dignity and grace. The five residents that passed away at the care facility where I work, have been an example to me. They have reflected it is through our imperfection in aging, that we grace this world. Though we cannot always be benevolent of heart and less driven by ego’s insecurities, we can prompt ourselves to live responsibly. We can wake up every day and in our finer moments, get close to our soul.
