This morning I woke from one of those brilliant, emotionally indelible dreams that you know really mean something. I was following the most enchanting music and my heart was light and joyful yet grounded in confidence. The music had grabbed my very soul and I found myself effortlessly moving to its source. I enter a whitewashed stone building and make a descent to the basement auditorium where my enchanting orchestra played. Down and around the corners of my subconscious, the music continues to guide me and I am in effortless, essential pursuit. I’ve got my ticket and I enter the auditorium.
This dream has sparked a reflection upon the two difficult years leading up to this deeply joyful and satisfied place, where the certainty that I am on my own true path is a tremendous source of peace, even in the face of life’s endless uncertainties. It is with nothing but gratitude that I look back on the many months of darkness, stillness, waiting, listening and watching in the belly of the beast. I’ve emerged with a fresh lens though I recall days, weeks, then stretches of months when I began and concluded each day utterly depleted.
I felt the grief of separation from the circumstances I wasn’t yet positioned to pursue and was overwhelmed by the sense of being in the wrong life.Eventually something shifted and my intention was galvanized and increasingly focused. The beginning was so subtle that it took weeks of consistent practice to really see and fully feel the early glimmers of transformation. This simple yet extremely powerful step built momentum; with commitment to the daily practice of mindfulness and spiritual study and contemplation in less than a year my entire life had been completely transformed.
While we may at first have absolutely no idea how we will emerge from the darkness or cross the chasm that seemingly separates us from the life of our
dreams, setting your intentions is the first step. Maybe all you can do is endure your present situation and hold onto those intentions like precious seeds, waiting for the warmth and light of spring to bring them to blossom. But remind yourself of them daily, hourly even. Soon you will find those seeds gaining strength, and perhaps a bit like a celestial song, drawing you toward your dreams.